I used to think that one of the great signs of security was the ability to just walk away. - Jack Nicholson

[locked from his family]

I'm not sure why I didn't die when I was supposed to. I have no way of knowing. Now with Mary back from the dead it's even harder to understand. I'm a very happy man having Mary back and at times I wonder if she'd be safer without me around. I know I shouldn't think it and I know Mary would wap me a good one for those thoughts. I also wonder should I try contacting the boys? Do I let them know both their parents are alive? Or do I just leave them safe knowing we are gone so they don't get distracted?

Hard questions to answer. There was a time I thought I had all the answers and nothing could go wrong. Then again happy with the woman I love isn't exactly wrong. I'm just not sure of the how and the why of it all. Dean and Sam I'm sure should have a choice to know. Maybe I'll talk to Mary, she always knew what to do before.

-- John Winchester -- Supernatural -- 175 Words --

It feels so good to be back at home again.

John had taken to living with Mary again like no time had passed between them. He went grocery shopping and was putting things away while she rested. He wanted her to be nicely surprised by it all. He made some coffee then and was sitting at the table reading the newspaper.

Now that I'm awake, I'm even more lost then before.